because life doesn’t fit in a file folder

SOMETHING WRONG

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Today, I ate a perfectly delicious pear.

In this part of the United States – January usually means down jackets, snow pants & polar fleece. Normally, I’m batting the flakes out of my eyelashes & scraping the ice from my windshield . By now, I should have built a snow fort or two, gone skiing or sledding or sipped hot chocolate by a fire.

But this year, while the earth is firm under my feet, I can still see the grass.

We are at a threshold, neither in nor out.

So on this winter morning, as I slid out the door wearing short sleeves — a blue t-shirt against the white sky – biting through soft summer flesh seemed…wrong.

Delicious but wrong.

In subtraction, they would call it the remainder.

I’m tired of these remnants, the what’s left sticky residue of summer on my fingers.

Let it be winter or let it be summer, but enough of this in-between.

Can you tell I’m feeling grumpy and frustrated? How am I ever supposed to move to a warmer climate when the mere thought of moving to a different state all by myself brings on a full blown panic attack? 

6 thoughts on “SOMETHING WRONG

  1. I hear you about the in-between. For me, I’ve learned the in-between is a place I need to be until clarity comes. Do you think the Earth is waiting for clarity, too?

    I believe you just might benefit from a dialogue with that part of yourself that holds that fear around moving – written, thought or expressed through your drawing – ask that question and listen to the answer.

    1. Thank you Carol! I just started an art class where I hope to work out some of these things. I actually think I’ve recently gotten some clarity about it! I decided that when I’m 55 THAT will be the time to head south! There are so many communities for people who are over-55…but I’m not there yet. So I have 4 years to enjoy my time here in Rochester and continue to visit and shop around before I figure out where exactly I’d like to put down next next set of roots! How’s THAT?

  2. Didn’t you hear…..global warming is coming to upstate New York, Giggle. Love Mom, Mama or just plain Joanie. Loves and Kisses. Keep smiling.

    1. Hahahaha! I don’t know about that! It’s pretty cruddy out there right now. I guess I spoke too soon! LOL.

  3. I’d say something about the winter weather but I’ve not had to lay my hands on a snow shovel or scrape a windshield yet so I’ll keep my mouth shut.

    “Everybody complains about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.”
    – Charles Dudley Warner

    1. Hi Brian! I think I spoke too soon. It’s been FREEZING cold here for the last 4 days. It should warm up to 25 tomorrow…maybe. Stay warm, friend! Hope all is well in your world.

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