because life doesn’t fit in a file folder
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An English Teacher's "Happy Ending"

I went back to Massage Envy to get my April massage, which just so happened to fall on April Fool’s Day.

My regular readers will likely (possibly) remember the grammar issues with the signage at over the last two visits.

But if you are new here (or need a quick refresher) click here to read the back story:

So this month I bopped in, said hello, made my way to the room where the warm massage table was waiting. I quickly disrobed, slid between the heated sheets, and spent a fabulous relaxing hour with Dean. (That sounds kind of naughty, but it wasn’t.)

I was so relaxed that I almost missed it.

I almost peed in my pants!

How much did I love that sign?

Those folks at Massage Envy not only got the sign right, but they had such a great sense of humor about the whole thing!

Plus they patiently waited for me to notice the sign – which had to be killing them.

I’m sure the girls up-front (not to mention the manager) wanted to smash my nose against it!

But they didn’t. They were professional and waited for me to notice it in my own good time.

And afterwards, they still let me eat a few fabulous dark chocolates wrapped in purple foil at the end of my session.

Well, I said I tip for great grammar, right?

Guess who left the recommended Renee J. tip?

Correcting grammar, one sign at a time.

Even if it takes me to the poorhouse. 😉

24 thoughts on “An English Teacher's "Happy Ending"

  1. So you have your own personal sign at the “rub ya down” place, huh? Well so do I. Mine is at the post office. It says WANTED.

  2. That is awesome! I love a great sense of humor 😉

  3. It’s nice to have such fun friends at the beauty parlor. Especially on April Fool’s Day. Hats off to them.

    1. Mom, it’s not a “beauty parlor”; it’s a massage parlor. It’s a place where I pay to get… You know what? Nevermind. 😉

  4. Humour is brilliant for solving conflict, even minor not-really-a-problem conflict.

    And, hey, that all sounded naughty enough for me. Sort of. Maybe.

  5. That’s awesome! I, too, notice incorrect signs and it drives me BONKERS!

    My favourite I’ve seen was someone wrote on a white board in a staff room at a school I supply in that they were available to supply. (Our proper term as substitutes is Occasional Teachers.) She listed one of her subjects as English then wrote “Occassional” – extra “s”. Someone else went and circled it and wrote “English teacher??” beside it.

    1. I’m guessing that sub is very occasional. 😉

      Or maybe I’m just hoping.

  6. I can just picture the spa staff squirming and giggling like excited 4-year-olds while they waited for you to notice.

    How come as soon as I read the title “Happy Ending” I knew this would be about a massage? Apparently I’ve got a dirty mind.

    1. KB:

      You can be as dirty as you’d like – as long as you spell everything well and use M.L.A. sanctioned grammar. 😉

  7. That is what you call a massage story with a good finish!

    1. I told you, Steve: the story had a “happy ending.”

      If you aren’t hip to that slang, you might need to click here:

      Not that I typically usually use urbandictionary as a primary resource or anything. 😉 But sometimes a girl just has to know what everyone is talking about.

      1. You rock! Can I add that dictionary to my Kindle so I can be hip and down with the brothers and sister?

    2. Please do. I aim to educate. Kind of. 😉

  8. Too much. I would’ve handled it with a complex strategy consisting of a) noticing the errors, b) not saying anything, and c) enjoying conflict free rub downs. But there’s only one Renee J! Glad they made it fun.

    1. I’m not big on the whole “not saying anything” route.

      Just ask Monkey.

      He’ll tell you I’m the Queen of Embarrassing. 😉

      1. Haha, I believe it. I sent you an email my dear. Chikity check it.

  9. You are doing important work for the future of society.

    I want to physically remove all signs from Mammoth Mountain that say this:

    “Loose control, loose your ticket.”

    Even my middle school-aged children laugh.

    Well done and carry on. ($30.00 well spent.)

    1. I know, Julie. Thank you for the validation.

      I feel it is very important work.

      Plus I believe I am single-handedly keeping the sign-makers of America employed.

      That is why we must remain ever vigilant.

      By the way, if you ever get a picture of one of those signs, please email it to me – STAT – at I’ll give you street cred and a link to your awesome blog.

      It is amazing how many “loosers” (sic) are out there. 😉

  10. That’s hysterical!! I wonder what the other patrons are thinking. “What does that girl have to tip an extra ten dollars for? Hmmm…”

    1. Good Lord! I hadn’t thought about that until now! I am naughty!

  11. Or, if you got a facial you might wind up in the porehouse…

  12. Hah! You are such a rock star.

    1. 😉 Thank you for noticing.

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